Tony Schwartz: Notice the Good, Cultivate Good Habits, Slow Down, and Do the Right Thing

Written by Sean Murphy. Posted in Rules of Thumb, skmurphy

Tony Schwartz wrote a  great post on “Turning 60: The Twelve Most Important Lessons I’ve Learned So Far.” Here are my top four from his list (original numbering preserved).

2. Notice the good. We each carry an evolutionary predisposition to dwell on what’s wrong in our lives. The antidote is to deliberately take time out each day to notice what’s going right, and to feel grateful for what you’ve got. It’s probably a lot.

I think this is a clever way of saying count your blessings, but a good habit to cultivate however you phrase it.

7. The more behaviors you intentionally make automatic in your life, the more you’ll get done. If you have to think about doing something each time you do it, you probably won’t do it for very long. The trick is to get more things done using less energy and conscious self-control. How often do you forget to brush your teeth?

There is a lot to be said for breaking out of the routine and “thinking outside of the box” but the more useful default activities you can turn into habit the more you can concentrate on what’s really important. Three useful business habits for you to consider:

  • Carry a pen and paper or 3×5 cards to capture thoughts, insights, and suggestions from others.
  • Make a list and work it. Less useful for exploring but essential for finishing. This is a habit I learned from my first business partner, David Woodruff, at Woodruff & Murphy, Decision Systems Associates. He always carried a clipboard and pen everywhere so that he could plan the day and work the plan. It was a habit he had picked up managing  small construction projects but it has broad applicability.
  • Always debrief at the end of a project. Ask for feedback and volunteer self-criticism before offering your suggestions to others. Especially when things have not gone well and you would rather sweep the wreckage under the rug.

8. Slow down. Speed is the enemy of nearly everything in life that really matters. It’s addictive and it undermines quality, compassion, depth, creativity, appreciation and real relationship.

I find this to be very hard by the middle of the day. Forcing myself to measure twice and cut once is easier in the morning than in the afternoon when I often I feel behind.  The right decision, especially where people are concerned, is critical. I try to meditate twice a day and take at least a short walk  to clear my head in the late afternoon. This is very counter-cultural for Silicon Valley and startups, it’s an overlooked source of effectiveness as a result.

10. Do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do, and don’t expect anything in return. Your values are one of the only possessions you have that no one can take away from you. Doing the right thing may not always get you what you think you want in the moment, but it will almost always leave you feeling better about yourself in the long run. When in doubt, default to calm and kind.

We always try to put clients first and make sure our partners get paid when we do. Bootstrapping a startup is a very difficult way to make a living and may of our clients find it to be very stressful from time to time. I try to remain empathetic since i have made most of the mistakes that I see them making or hear them recount. But I also try and be as honest and direct as they can tolerate, explaining what I see as the key facts in  a situation, and courses of action that they should consider.

 

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